Granting forgiveness is more for the one that was offended, than it is for the offender. When you don’t forgive, you imprison yourself; chain yourself to the offender, who may not realize he / she has hurt you the way you are hurting or has chosen to forget about it. Here is six ways to grant forgiveness.
1. Acknowledge your pain and anger
2. Be specific about your future expectations and limits
3. Give up your right to “get even”
4. Let go of the blame, resentment, and negativity
5. Communicate your act of forgiveness to the other person
6. Work toward reconciliation if at all possible and when safe
Remember, forgiveness does not mean you forget. It is a decision you make to forgive. It is two dimensional – decisional and emotional. This is one of the chapters in my book “this was not supposed to happen”.
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Forgiveness for the most part, is not easy. We have been told we need to forgive, but how do we do it. Here are six thoughts on how to proceed.
1. Give full attention to your partner when talking ... make eye contact; do not be looking at or involved in any other activity that would indicate you are not listening